I always loved that part of the story on how we were named. It’s a story that my mama never got tired of telling her children. For my sis and I , it was much shorter. The best part was with my lil bro, who happened to be our last born.

“Do you know that your name was to be Jesse, not Desmond? But your dad couldn’t allow because of how luhyias pronounce it”, my mama could narrate.

This would trigger laughter among our close knit four member family. We would laugh and talk (normally my bro and I would be the loudest) . then would follow my mamas college stories before we cajole my bro on his choice of girlfriends. We even had nicknames for his girlfriends. He would tell us of how his taste was light skin with long hair. We would criticize them but always it would attract more laughter.

I remember how we would wake up in the morning to have breakfast in more than two hours . chatting and laughing over small nothings. My bro and I had special bond. Instead of sharing clothes with my siz, we were always on the look out to rob each other’s wardrobe.

He would tell me how rich I was making him since my dowry would be so much. The way he would hug my mum, tease my siz or apologize when he was wrong. How he could not hide his emotions. How he would relish every meal that always left me, if I was the cook, happy that someone enjoyed my food.

When I was a little gal, I always prayed that God make him tall (we are quite short in our family), and thanks to God he answered my prayers. The sparkle in his face when you complimented him.

I remember always inwardly thanking God for giving me a very handsome bro. though we would fight, he was my only bro. my kid bro. our last born baby. The joys when he got 412 marks in his KCPE exams. That call I still remember it. The elated voice over the is still fresh……

The gloomy evening of 3rd April 2014. That call from the university chaplain that told me my bro was no more.

“we did all we could but he dint make it”

I hoped it was a dream. I wanted to believe it was a lie. I had called him the whole day without response. Little did I know his body was lifeless in the morgue. I still don’t want to believe that Dessy is gone but the grave is a sign that you are gone forever. You will never smile at me again. No texts saying good night siz. No whatsapp funny clips. My mom wont call and ask it is Dessy or Aseyo(since we even confused my mom over the phone). Wherever you are, just know that I love you. I don’t know how long it will take me to accept that you are no more. I want to say it’s a dream but you are no more but its true you are gone . I loved you ,, I loved you so much. I loved you more than you may ever have were the man I have spent the longest time of my life with and you never failed me. We loved you so much, but God loved you more. Rest in peace Dessy .


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