The Drive

More than often we dream . i think most of us go by the tittle , dream until you can dream no more . We plan, analyze , have missions and visions of execution . I don’t know how many times we get want we want easy, but for me its very minimal. Most times , I struggle a lot to have something i have wanted . Not that  I did not have a plan , but its ideally because i will somehow encounter a hindrance  .

i have a very funny way of dealing with draw backs,. My first and most crucial stage is retreat and cry . Oh yes ,, i cry my heart out . This enables me to get rid of anxiety , anger , regrets any another emotional attachments to the situation . Tears generally wash away the prospect of failure and keep up the hope of a brighter tomorrow . Tears make me energetic .

After this, i have two ways to re-plan . I will take a long walk at night alone or sit outside and watch the sky . Darkness has some way of making me think straight . Especially after reminiscing the old time, the nostalgic feeling of the current situation helps me think of all the possible solution to the current situation . The draw back with this method is that if i fail to get a solution , the darkness provides best opportunity of a possible second crying phase ( i cry a lot) .

My second choice is the kitchen .  A good recipe has a way of manipulating my mind to think straight . with music i don’t know in the background (mostly soft rock) , I have the ability to do magic in the kitchen which in turn always translates to my mind .The thought of cooking for my family such a sumptuous meal , especially my kids, makes me wanna have a solution to every situation . it reminds me that as a mum, my children will always look up to me for answers . If i cant find answers now while I don’t have that responsibility , how will i handle it while i have another responsibility ?

Money and legacy are other things that drive me in life . Why would i want to work hard and have renumeration for it if I dint have bills to settle ? Why would i want to work extra hours if i dint want to do my job better and leave a legacy at my place of work .

I may have other “smaller” drives but i always have something that gives me that extra push .

Above all prayer and communication with God . I believe that no plan will succeed without God . I may be childish but at times ( because i have failed severally to keep clean for long) , i have had to literally avoid the smallest sin , like snorting inwardly just to remain pure because i am working on something . Every plan should be committed to God and He will establish it .